Final Issue June 15th, 2005 
 FEATURED NEWS
ESPN’s Sports Guy Named to “Forbidden Visitor List” by State of Massachusetts
Boston, MA — The final step was reached in the steady decline of the former Boston Sports Guy following his move to Los Angeles when numerous eyewitnesses saw him sporting a red Kabbalah string bracelet, while having an avocado and ahi tuna salad at the uber trendy restaurant “The Ivy.” MORE ...
 SPORTS
Fourteen Things Overheard in Bill Belichick’s Office
1. Goddamnit, who spilled Gatorade on my InTouch?
2. Ah, who gives a shit, let’s just throw the ball deep and see what happens.
3. Hey Pioli, you catch "The L Word” last night? MORE ...
 SOCIETY
Michael Moore to Keynote Al-Qaeda National Convention
Somewhere in Pakistan - Al Qaeda officials today confirmed that documentary filmmaker and self-proclaimed muckraker Michael Moore was selected to keynote their 2005 National Convention to take place sometime this fall. MORE ...
 CULTURE
George Bush Demands End to Neutering and Spaying of Cats and Dogs
Price is Right Host Bob Barker “Really Fucking Pissed Off”
Washington, DC - In a continued effort to legislate his beliefs on the sanctity of life, the 43rd president George W. Bush has asked Congress to enact legislation that would outlaw the common practice of removing the reproductive systems of common house pets. MORE ...

"THROWN UNDER THE BUS" THROWN UNDER THE BUS

HOWARD DEAN'S PET NAMES FOR REPUBLICANS

Bootlicking sandalfuckers

Imperialistic sand nazis

Taintcupping luddite swamphogs

Big mean bullies

Niggerless honkymaggots

Schadenfreudin' shitstorm troopers

Pigstickin' capitialistic toadies

ARCHIVES
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